moving and surviving afterwards..

i did the whole moving trip in 22 hours straight thru.. making stops only to gas up, eat, pee breaks and short breaks to wake up..

my cats also fought against the tranquilizers.. so i had to make stops to give them more pills to keep them sleeping..

but one cat, Katzi, got so worked up wanting out of the carrier, he tried biting the metal bars on the cage and broke off a bottom fang..

there was blood all over the place.. and plus he was using his claws too trying to pry open the cage.. he was bleeding from his paws as well..

that was quite a messy clean-up in one long break.. and then i gave him a whole tranq..

and so while waiting for the tranq to kick in.. i kept taking Katzi out of the carrier and carrying him around like a baby over my shoulder.. or i let him sit on my seat..

he was way too groggy to walk.. he was the only one who wanted to drink or eat.. the other 2 weren't even interested.. and they mostly slept.. but wanted contact with my hand touching their faces.. a reassurance that i was there.. Katzi fell asleep with his head against my hand.. and so driving became a bit difficult.. i was driving such a big uhaul truck and also watching the car trailer behind me.. lucky for me i am strong to hold the wheel, even one handed..

i left quite a lot of stuff behind, that my neighbors had to clean up in my garage and my apartment.. i felt pretty bad about that.. but also relieved becuz there was some stuff that shithead wanted me to still hold for him.. which i really didn't want to anymore.. they never made the effort to come and get what they wanted.. i did bring some of their stuff with me.. which is now in storage in one of the sheds i have at my new place..

oh.. and Sis never made it up to help me pack or clean up..

i hate to say that i knew she wouldn't come.. when they moved into their new apartment away from shithead's mother.. i knew something would come up, preventing her from following thru on the moving plans..

but it turned out alright.. my neighbors more than willingly helped out over the weekend..

including packing up the truck and loading up my car onto the car trailer..

i was quite impressed and also grateful to have such help...

i got to arizona around 4am on the morning of december 29th.. scaring my parents awake who thought some prowler was on their porch trying to break in.. LOL!!

nobody could hear me knocking on the door.. and so i went to the bedroom window and knocked on the glass.. that got them up..

they were so groggy but were pretty happy to see me..

and then the days that followed had more downs than up..

it's taken the last 2 months to finally get to a point with my mom, that we have more good days instead of me always feeling almost suicidal again.. or really wanting to take up drinking to numb the pain she emotionally inflicted on me..

my mom is a bi-polar.. and she won't admit it becuz she doesn't think that she's like that..

and once she gets an idea in her head about something.. you can't change it..

things are finally working out to where i'm able to even enjoy my new place..

i can't have anything where i want it.. but once i'm there alone at night.. i can relax..

i finally heard from Nor!!

she's back from her travels to several hospitals in the surrounding areas..

having been in and out of surgeries since october.. and still having more surgery soon, the last surgery, her intestines were put back in wrong.. and so now she looks like she's 9months pregnant..

she sent me my w2 i was needing for my taxes.. but of course no money was sent to me that she owes me..

i didn't ask, knowing that she has tens of thousands of dollars in medical bills to pay..

i just don't want to be a pest about such trivial things.. it would be nice to have the $600 she owes me.. but i'll ask her later.. i'm not one of those money grubbing bitches..

finding a job has been quite a challenge if not pretty difficult..

there are plenty of openings but online applications only.. i personally don't think there's anyone checking out those apps..

but i'm not worried about it.. my parents say that my main job is to help my mom.. and they are paying for the bills.. they told me it's not hugely important for me to find a job right away.. since i'm here to help my mom.. fine.. i'm not quite worried about it.. and my dad gives me money if i need something.. or they buy me what i need for the house or whatever..

i have it pretty good right now.. so now i have no complaints..