Toremented Desire makes you feel funny...

why is one always drawn to those that they can't really have?

is it becuz it is forbidden or just becuz the person seems to have traits that makes them desirable...??

i have a couple of male friends online that seem to be what i want in a man.. but the downside is that they are married..
and there's no way that i can pursue them.. my conscience won't let me.. becuz i had lost my husband long ago to someone who pursued him while we were married.. and i know the pain, heartbreak and mess it can cause to break up a marriage.. becuz it happened to me..

i feel bad that i feel this way..
but i really can't help it.. i am human after all..
or just a really lonely woman.. who craves to have some of what i've been missing for so long..

being the better person doesn't always make you feel good.. even tho you know it is the right thing to do..
always sacrificing for the greater good.. and at the expense of your heart..

it's a bitch..